Cyber Security Engineer / Homemaker
Asian / Caucasian
Hysun was born in a small town in Hawaii on the island of Kauai. Since his family frequently moved around the islands, he was always the new kid wherever they went, so he mostly kept to himself and focused on his studies.
Kimberly was born in San Antonio, Texas. Her father was in the Air Force so she was in Okinawa, Japan by the time she was 3 months old. They moved a few more times to Maryland and Hawaii before settling back in Maryland for all of her teenage years. Kimberly has two kids from a previous marriage. Both children were so comfortable around Hysun that new acquaintances assumed that they had been around each other their entire lives.
Kim and Hysun were both non-traditional college students studying computer science at different schools when they met. Afterward, Hysun transferred to the college that Kimberly was attending and started his first class there just before their wedding. They both obtained their bachelor's degrees the next year as newlyweds in their 30s. They have now spent seven amazing years together. He works from home while she takes care of the house and kids. This gives them a lot of time together and they wouldn’t want it any other way. They try to go on a date every week where they have dinner and then spend time walking around the park, browsing the local used bookstore, or talking over coffee. They really cherish the relationship that they have worked to build and how open and honest they can be with each other.
Kim has two children from a previous relationship that we are raising together, but we had discussed the ideal family size while we were dating and wanted to aim for 2-3 more. However, Hysun has a genetic disorder that makes him infertile, so we spent about five years attempting IVF without success. We looked at all the options and decided that we would like to move forward with adoption. We have both had experiences with people in our lives who needed to place their children with someone else’s family. We understand the struggles that they went through, and we believe we could provide a safe environment for their child that they feel confident in.
We live in the Texas Hill Country on more than 6 acres in a house that from the moment we first stepped foot on the property felt like home in a way that no place has ever felt like for either of us in our entire lives. It is two stories with 4 bedrooms. The backyard includes areas for the chickens, the pig, and the goats. It also includes areas to play and a fire-pit that we use for cookouts and to watch the stars at night.
Our neighborhood is spread out and quiet. The town we live just outside of is great for families, with a ton of activities, from chalk festivals to free concerts to movies in the parks. There are parent/child dances, theaters (both for movies and for plays and concerts) and parks along the river to play at. There is a wide variety of cuisines, and we often enjoy going out to eat as a family.
I would describe Hysun as loyal and honest. He is comfortable with who he is. He is passionate about learning, he is always teaching himself something new. He throws himself so completely into everything he does; he always gives 100%. I think that all of these things make him a great parent as well as the fact that he is devoted to his family and loves spending time with his kids.
Kim is my soulmate and is a very nurturing person. She takes care of everyone, but sometimes neglects to take care of herself. She has home schooled both kids and has kept them involved in various extracurricular activities according to their interests. She is working hard to take care of her health and has set a great example to the kids by teaching them about nutrition and exercise. Kim loves me and accepts me for who I am and who I am trying to become. She encourages me to keep reaching for my goals.
In February 2015, we met online when Kimberly was 32 and Hysun was 37. Kimberly was trying to enter the dating scene while incredibly busy being a full time college student, homeschooling her kids, and helping care for her ill mother. Hysun came to the dating site after listening to a TedTalk about the unique matching algorithms used there. He was intrigued and wanted to learn more, so he made an account to see how it worked. We found each other’s profile when the site gave us a 99% match. We started talking and quickly hit it off. This led to our first date on February 20th at a Starbucks near Kim’s college.
We fell in love very quickly and were engaged by April. Hysun dressed up as Kim’s favorite doctor (the ninth) from Doctor Who when he proposed, including a quote that this “would be the trip of a lifetime together.” It really has been and Kim has loved every minute of it.
Be genuine. Don’t pretend to be someone you are not, and especially don’t let other people’s expectations for you pressure you into being someone you are not.
Be open. Human beings are complicated. The best way to make sure you are understood is to speak openly and honestly with those who matter to you. And do it face-to-face as much as possible.
Be loving. True love means wanting what is best for others. Sometimes that requires giving something up of ourselves, but sometimes it means letting someone go through difficult times so they can learn from them.
Pursue God. Humans are imperfect, but God is perfect. God wants to give us an amazing life, better than anything we can imagine. But most of all He wants to have a genuine, open, and loving relationship with us.
Having an open adoption is very important to us. We know that each situation will look different and we are excited to sit down and discuss what ours would look like with everyone involved.
Open adoption allows the child to get to know their family history and why they were placed for adoption. All of the adults involved in the adoption have roles to play in the child’s life and things to share with the child. We cannot possibly fill some of those roles, such as telling them whose eyes they have or where they got their laugh. In adopting a child we are not just bringing them into our family. Instead, we are extending two families with people who will always be important to us.
We recognize that this closeness takes time and work to build between people, and we are willing to do this. We also recognize that there are phases of openness and that these relationships will be constantly changing. We want to be as accommodating as possible to provide the best environment for everyone involved.